REALLY? Come ON!
Yesterday I walked more at one time than I've ever walked in a day. With incline. 9 miles on the treadmill. Yes, it took me 3 hours, but I did it because I couldn't believe how much I had gained yesterday and was determined to see the scale go DOWN. So I worked my ASS off.
I ate a 1 egg omelet with feta, tomato and spinach for breakfast.
I ate 1/2 cup of unsweetened Greek yogurt with 1 tbsp. almond butter for lunch.
I had dark chocolate covered pomegranate bits for a snack.
I had garlic soup (about 1 cup) for dinner, with a 3x3 square piece of no sugar, no wheat coconut cream pie following.
Later, 2 glasses of wine and a sugar free coconut oil/coco/stevia chocolate the size of a quarter and about 1/4 inch thick.
And I gained.
And again, when I complain about the scale going up, there are those who try to tell me that muscle weighs more than fat. OK. But an I really build that much muscle that fast? I think not. Besides, I'm not really all that sore. I didn't do anything that was really muscle building. It was just walking, bumped up to aerobic level on and off and up to a 6% incline at times, but just walking. And if I am building muscle, why the HELL is it not helping me to burn fat?
Now granted, when I go to work tomorrow and weigh on the Tanita, I will be able to see if there is additional muscle, but I'm afraid to see how high the weight is!! HOLY HELL!
I'm really not motivated to do shit today. But I will. I'll do 5 or 6 maybe, depending on what movie I pick to watch while I'm slogging through it. Maybe I'll do yoga later just to release the negativity that I currently feel toward my body. This is just pissing me off!
It's looking more and more like the only way I'm going to get this off is to do another round of HCG.
Breakfast-2 pieces of string cheese and 1 beef stick
Lunch-1/2 cup cottage cheese and an apple
Snack-1/2 cup greek yogurt with 1 tbsp. almond butter
Dinner-small salad with lettuce, 100 g chicken breast, 1/4 pear, 1 tbsp. gorgonzola, onion and 6-8 pecans with a vinaigrette dressing.
Snack-dark chocolate covered pomegranate bits (perhaps 20 or 30...they were tiny) and yogurt covered almonds (a handful...maybe 6-8).
I walked for 2.5 hours in the morning and did about 20 min. of yoga in the evening.
I worked on my book the the remainder of the day, so not much movement, though I did some house work on and off.
Really? That made me gain more than a pound?
I have decided that the way I'll know if I need to do another round is to see what my weight does in the next two weeks. If I don't get down to my lowest point so far this year by my birthday, I'll do another. That will mean 3 weeks of concentrated effort will have done nothing to bring my weight down and it's warranted.
I realize that muscle weighs more than fat, and that my fat ratio is perfect according to the stupid body composition analyzer. But at what point does this increased muscle burn that extra fat that I do not want?
I'm off to get my treadmill time in. Grudgingly.
I just closed out a whole post and lost it. I guess it's a sign.
Well, it is Monday. I don't know why I should expect different at this point. I didn't sleep for beans last night...again. What is it about Sunday nights and not being able to sleep?
I have a jam packed morning full of appointments, but I should be done by noon. Then I'm doing to come home and take a damn nap! If I can get my head on straight after that, treadmill. I'm going to attempt another week like last week to see what happens.
Why, I don't know. It would appear that I am up a lb. or so. Even with those two days of being up an undetermined amount, I'm at best at a zero loss for the week. But really, it looks to me like a gain.
I do not understand it. Between Tuesday and Sunday I walked or rode 38 miles, not including Saturday because I was on my feet all day and was just too exhausted to to anything by the end of that day.
My easter 'splurges' were 1 sugar-free, low-carb mock Cadbury each day, a 1x1 inch piece of sugar-free, low-carb coconut cream pie Sat. and a 1x2 in piece of same on Sunday. Otherwise, my meals were reasonable portions of low carb goodness. Last night, 1 cup of 44 clove garlic soup with a small salad for dinner. I didn't really eat 'breakfast' or 'lunch' per say...I had two piece of string cheese, a beef stick and 1/2 an apple before our ride and hike, 1 serving of cashews immediately after, and a scoop of peanut butter when I got home.
I'd love to think I'm building some muscle and my clothes are going to fit smaller today. If that is the case, I'd like to know when the muscle I've built is boing to help me burn more fat so I see the numbers come down! This is really starting to piss me off.
Looking ahead, August through October are going to be busy travel times with a good amount of eating out and less control over how much I can exercise. Starting out from where I am now would be a disaster. Moving into the holidays from that point? OMG!
If I don't see some downward progression by Memorial Day, I'm going to have to start protocol again. I'm not keen on doing that. I know I may expect only 10-12 lb. in 6 weeks starting this close to my goal weight, but even a couple of lb. per week is progress! Holy Hell, maybe I should just include my dinner out for my birthday in my loading days, start protocol in two weeks, and be done with it by the end of May!
While my weight may be higher than I would prefer, and that bumps my BMI, I weighed on my work scale anyway. Come to find out my percentage of body fat is PERFCT at 26.0! I'm a little happier now. And I have it in me to go get on the treadmill instead of taking a nap!
This is ridiculous!
Yesterday I did not exercise because I was on my feet baking all day. By the time I was done and made dinner, my feet and legs were killing me and I was beat.
However, everything I baked was low carb, and I didn't even eat much of it!
I had 2 pieces of bacon and a Baby Bel original for breakfast.
Of the stuff I was making, I had one sugar-free Cadbury knock off (6 carbs) and 1/4 of a piece of the coconut cream pie (a 1x1 square, because I made 12 individuals in a brownie pan). We had a spinach/tomato/onion/feta frittata for dinner. I had 1/4 of the 5 egg frittata. We ate early, and later when I was hungry again I ate a piece of string cheese and a beef stick.
Today I'll freeze some of what I made yesterday. The plan was also to make the 44 clove garlic soup, salad with a complementing homemade garlic dressing and sugar-free, gluten free carrot cake for today. However, we've decided that we are going to pack up the bikes and go for a nice, challenging ride first. We are going to do the Mauthe Lake/Long Lake loop. Depending on how I feel when we get back, we'll see how much of the cooking actually gets done. I haves some cleaning and some research that must be done too. So I have to figure out how to fit all that in.
Anyway, if we complete the whole bike trip, that will be 42 miles I've covered this week...without losing any weight. The average calorie intakes has been about 1200-1500 (with a range of perhaps 900-1700).
Yeah, because it's impossible to NOT lose weight if you just eat fewer calories and move a little. I call bullshit.
Same old as far as food goes, but I switched it up a bit and biked 10 miles instead of walking.
Up .4, which seems impossible. I didn't eat any more yesterday. I walked a little less. I got 5 miles in instead of 7.5-8 miles. I did it in two separate walks. I did 3 on the treadmill in the morning, and 2 in a neighborhood walk in the evening. But as far as food, it was pretty similar to the days before.
I'm trying to figure out how I can do a steak day and still get 8 miles in. If I eat early, like 3 or 4, I can walk from like 6-8 pm. I don't know if I'd be able to walk before that...trying to get miles behind me with no nourishment could end up to be a bad thing. It wasn't bad when I did it that way in the morning, but I was eating by noon. I don't even get back from work until after 3.
I guess I can only see how I feel and do what I can do. I just don't see how it's possible to gain anything when I sti
FINALLY down .9
If I can keep this up a few more days I'll be very happy. I'm almost to the lowest point since January, where I was riding pretty happy for so long.
This weekend is Easter. We actually celebrate the original holiday of Ostara or Eostre, the celebration of spring equinox and the origin of the bunnies and the eggs. Well make food with eggs and stuff that shouldn't set me back at all. The only part that will be different this year I'll be filling my (grown) daughter's basket with non-sugar items.
For her 20 years, her stocking and her basket were filled with stuff that I knew was toxic, but traditional. I figured a couple of times a year, it couldn't hurt. But considering now that she controls everything else she eats, and has for some time, and it is primarily starch and sugar, I just can't add to the damage that does. So I'm looking for alternatives today. I found a recipe for sugar-free chocolate eggs that I may try. I have some non-food items as well.
Up .7...but really down
It looked to me on the analog like yesterdays efforts had brought me back to where I wanted to be, so I risked the Wii. It said up .7, but considering how far up I'd been the last couple of days, it was really down about 2 lb. Considering the buckets of sweat involved in both the walking and yoga yesterday (though I drank easily a gallon and a half of water throughout the day after) I'd have to believe some of that lost was water.
I plan to try to do the same thing today and see where it gets me. I'm not sure how tomorrow and Friday will go, as I do work outside the home, but the appointments are scattered and sometimes that messes up my workout plans. It may be a shorter walk outside both evenings
I still refuse to get on the Wii scale, but the analog shows upward progression.
Yesterday could not be a steak day. Nor can today.
Yesterday was one of those days when I was so tried I couldn't even function. I was in a fog, clumsy, and seriously in a space where trying to read or write put me to sleep in a matter of minutes. In fact, I did fall asleep on the computer once. I have no idea how long I was out, but it couldn't have been for long. It was a very deep sleep.
I also had those cravings for carbs. Those irresistible carvings. By that I mean it in the most literal terms...I tried to resist and found it nearly impossible.
I don't know if that was kicked off by the ingestion of bread in the form of my choice of the panini over salad the day before, or the extreme fatigue. While I had made the connection with carbs and fatigue a few weeks ago, I did not experience it so much last week when I my drag as Monday.
In any case, I resisted only perhaps 50% of the time. I had an Ezekiel English Muffin at one point. Other times, I nibbled on dark chocolate covered blueberries. Often. To the point that I easily ate a cup (as in 8 oz.) of these over the course of 6 or 7 hours. Little constant hits of sugar, a few blueberries at a time.
I can be grateful that I didn't have any other sugar or bread in the house. I can be grateful that my 'binging' isn't a whole pint of ice-cream or bag of cookies. But I still see the repercussions of my actions on the scale and in the way I currently feel (bloated).
I only have two weeks to correct this. My birthday is in two weeks and I have PLANS to go off track. I also have plans for corrective action. But I really, really would like to be MUCH lower than I was even before the last couple of days.
My first order of the day, this day and every day that I am home, is treadmill. Then writing, Then yoga. Every day. If I hit it hard, and I can keep the calories low, I should be able to recoup. And I have to avoid Mondays like the last few.
I can't let this spiral out of control. And I'm blogging it because it's a perfect illustration, painfully honest, of how it can go that way. It would be way to easy to say it's gone above that place where I can just way 'screw it' and keep going. For me, on the analog, that means bumping up to over 140. It was 141 or 142. It's been riding just below 140, with the lowest being 138 on the analog. (Of course the Wii is always higher.)
So I'm 3-5 lb. higher right now, just from the last TWO DAYS! And they weren't even horrible, OMG I CAN'T BELIEVE I ATE THE WHOLE THING sort of days or anything. They were 'inclusion of a piece of bread and the equivalent of a few teaspoons of sugar' sort of days. In my old life that would be, well, just a day. Actually, not even a day. That might have been just a meal on some days.
But since I know better now, I have to do better.
I got 8 miles in and 40 minutes of yoga. So far, I've consumed 922 calories, which is more than the 867 my app says I should, but I doubt I'll go over 1000 even if I have a snack or a glass of wine later.
It has been suggested to me that because I gained from so little bread that perhaps the way I now eat has made me 'carb sensitive.' I don't believe that to be true. I think this probably always was the way I reacted to carbs...which is why I gained 10 lb. per year for years on end. I think maybe there is a point at which I built up a tolerance so that the damage was not so obvious.
I was very active as a fat person. I might have been able to only walk 3 miles at a time before my feet hurt, but it was a lot more work to carry around that much more weight too...and I often worked out for 2 or 3 hours per day. I wasn't necessarily consistent. I often quit after 3 or 4 more months of no visible progress, but I did it.
The difference is now I catch it and take corrective action. When I do the work I expect to see the result. Before, I could never get past a certain point. And maybe I won't this time. I don't know. But to me, what I see now helps make sense of the past. I don't see it as any different than it ever was. I just understand it better now. I think.
I struggled with my weight for over 20 years. I tried everything to lose weight. Yes, I did 'eat less, move more' repeatedly, convinced that doing the same thing over and over would someone yield different results. Desperate, having diligently done all the 'right' things and being told by several doctors that there was nothing wrong with me except that I wasn't trying hard enough, in 2009 I tried what seemed crazy: Dr. Simeons Hcg protocol. I lost 85 lb.