I'm stumped. And pissed. I do not even know what to say except revisit my post from yesterday and ask those that insist anyone will lose weight on 500 calories a day (of which I was one until this morning)...oh really?
I haven't deviated from the plan one iota. I haven't even wanted to. I haven't been hungry. Yesterday I had salad with chicken, lettuce, apple (and yes, Walden Farms 0 calorie dressing) + 1 grissini for lunch and chicken and steamed cabbage with 1/4 grapefruit + 1 grissini for dinner. Perhaps the dressing was the problem? It never has been before, but I don't recall such a large jump before that couldn't be explained by weighing at a different time of day or something. That's the only thing that keeps me going this morning. That and a lot of faith that this MUST work eventually. It's the only thing that ever has. It is my only hope. Diet and exercise didn't do it for the last 6 months. This is it. Yesterday after posting, I got dressed for work and I put my rings on for the first time in a long time. They fit snug, which surprised me because even though the increments have been slow, they have been downward. I've worn the rings in the last few weeks, and while they were almost uncomfortably tight, I could get them on and off. With steady bumps down on the scale, I expected them to go on more easily. I almost decided not to wear them because they were hard enough to get on, I wasn't sure I'd get them off. My thought at the time was that my perception of myself as bigger and lumpy from the day before must be water weight that I was now seeing verified in my hands. By the end of the day, they were so lose they were spinning on my fingers. And my pants kept falling down. It will be the last time I can wear them until I take in the waist. Which was a good thing, because I weighed at work and the Tanita declared me obese and had my fat percentage, weight, and BMI higher than even the Wii. I would have gone into a tailspin if the rings and pants weren't telling me something different. If I had still been feeling lumpy and bigger, and gotten confirmation...I would have been a puddle of tears I think. There was a serious disconnect with this experience, but I told myself whatever was going on would resolve today. I was wrong. Now the only thing I can tell myself is to keep going...it will resolve tomorrow. I know the Hcg is working just like it is supposed to as far as how I feel. I have to wonder what the hell is going on with my body??
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AuthorI struggled with my weight for over 20 years. I tried everything to lose weight. Yes, I did 'eat less, move more' repeatedly, convinced that doing the same thing over and over would someone yield different results. Desperate, having diligently done all the 'right' things and being told by several doctors that there was nothing wrong with me except that I wasn't trying hard enough, in 2009 I tried what seemed crazy: Dr. Simeons Hcg protocol. I lost 85 lb. Archives
April 2012
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